By Raúl Gorrín.- Shame is an emotion that pretends to hide some
defect or action from ourselves that we believe if we were seen. This could
provoke rejection from others. It is an emotion that makes us to hide ourselves
from the rest of the people or make us self-criticism to avoid or minimize the
destructive criticism or rejection from others. Although, some shame feelings
such as anger, sadness and fear indicate that something very bad is happening
in our lives that motivate us to modify a certain embarrassing behavior.
Excessive shame is a negative feeling. It
drives us away from others so that personal relationship is damaged or
abandoned. It is like when a person says to himself: "I have many defects
and complexes that I can never improve, I better laugh". But not
everything is so bad when we talk about shame, because there a positive way, it
is manifested through a temporary state that tells us that something is really
wrong in our relationships with the world. It tells us that the connection
between us and others has broken and we need to repair it. Positive shame is
like a good friend who is not afraid to tell us that we are ruining our lives.
In
addition, when we feel ashamed, we want to disappear, but at the end, we want
to be accepted through our emotions and in some corner, we hope to return to
the side of our family and friends, that is precisely one of the advantages of
positive shame because it guides us back to the community, reality and
happiness Also, it helps us discover important truths about ourselves It can be
of great value, because we could accept the human limits if we don’t experience
shame.
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